Hollywood couldn't write this
I don't even know where to begin .....
So here it is. It is Saturday and I am sitting with family. Carving pumpkins, watching horror movies when all of the sudden.......lights flicker and the TV shuts off. Odd I think but who cares. Suddenly the my crackberry rings and I can hear my heart break. Its Slammy. I know what he is going to say, "Tin Man the power in the computer room is out. Now this is no oridnary weekend. There's a huge sporting event and the traffic is insane. So I tell my real boss that I have to go check out work.
I get to work and all the lights are on. So immediately I am relaxed and things are looking up. I walk down the hallway and come to the door. I pull out my wallet and scan my card.......NOTHING. I look down and sure enough there is no power. So lets check the other doors.......NOTHING. You have to be kidding me. So I call Slammy and also find "Freddy" the electrician. Of course we can't open the doors, but luckily we find the "super" and he lets us in. I get to the Third World Data Center (TWDC) and naturally I can't get in the door. I look in the window and darkness, pure darkness. Holy Sh*t.
So to make an already long story short. It winds up the a UPS was on overload and when the power came back it had to be manually turned on. Now here is the "Tin Man" all alone in the TWDC. First, Nasal Voice shows up. We call all the important people we need to. Including the Sarge. And he asks "Do I need to be there?" I say "Of course not. What are you going to do, watch over my shoulder and continually ask me are we there yet?" Luckily we get to fix this without the Sarge and VPoO. Of course we have multiple issues. Can get the support lines switched, the anti virus software takes down the cluster, the "billion dollar" phone system doesn't work. As usual the team gets it all together and all is up and fine.
It is now Monday. And of course the Sh*t us going to hit the fan. I mean you can feel the intensity in the building. The Sarge comes over and barks "We are having a meeting at 10 to discuss Saturdays events." At approx. 9:55 VPoO comes over and asks me the "Tin Man" to join him for a VP meeting. Me and not the Sarge. And we know that does not sit well at all. Now this is my first VP meeting and let me tell you it was intense. Very Intense. Everyone is trying to throw each other under the bus and I sit and watch in awe how afraid every one is of our COO. The Sarge has his meeting and pisses off all of the other managers. Luckily I am not there. I return from the meeting and go outside for some air. And the battles begin........
The Sarge joins us for our fresh air. All finally go back inside except me and the Sarge. DING DING ROUND 1.
The Sarge says, "I don't know why you are in that meeting, I should be there. You have no business being in there. I f they want you to be the IT Director that's fine. I'm done. I'm the one who knows everything that goes on in the TWDC. I should be there. I don't sweep things under the rug. I call it as it is. This is ridiculus." (Yes, he rapes the English language. Even people that speak Ebonics say "Damn cracker! That's not a word!")
Tin Man calmly responds "Don't get made at me. Take it up with VPoO", you fucking midget.
Now the comment of "I don't sweep things under the rug" is one of the funniest lines I have ever heard. I mean all of the stuff that this man has done to others and yet he doesn't sweep. He uses a street sweeper.
Stay tuned for ROUND 2.
So here it is. It is Saturday and I am sitting with family. Carving pumpkins, watching horror movies when all of the sudden.......lights flicker and the TV shuts off. Odd I think but who cares. Suddenly the my crackberry rings and I can hear my heart break. Its Slammy. I know what he is going to say, "Tin Man the power in the computer room is out. Now this is no oridnary weekend. There's a huge sporting event and the traffic is insane. So I tell my real boss that I have to go check out work.
I get to work and all the lights are on. So immediately I am relaxed and things are looking up. I walk down the hallway and come to the door. I pull out my wallet and scan my card.......NOTHING. I look down and sure enough there is no power. So lets check the other doors.......NOTHING. You have to be kidding me. So I call Slammy and also find "Freddy" the electrician. Of course we can't open the doors, but luckily we find the "super" and he lets us in. I get to the Third World Data Center (TWDC) and naturally I can't get in the door. I look in the window and darkness, pure darkness. Holy Sh*t.
So to make an already long story short. It winds up the a UPS was on overload and when the power came back it had to be manually turned on. Now here is the "Tin Man" all alone in the TWDC. First, Nasal Voice shows up. We call all the important people we need to. Including the Sarge. And he asks "Do I need to be there?" I say "Of course not. What are you going to do, watch over my shoulder and continually ask me are we there yet?" Luckily we get to fix this without the Sarge and VPoO. Of course we have multiple issues. Can get the support lines switched, the anti virus software takes down the cluster, the "billion dollar" phone system doesn't work. As usual the team gets it all together and all is up and fine.
It is now Monday. And of course the Sh*t us going to hit the fan. I mean you can feel the intensity in the building. The Sarge comes over and barks "We are having a meeting at 10 to discuss Saturdays events." At approx. 9:55 VPoO comes over and asks me the "Tin Man" to join him for a VP meeting. Me and not the Sarge. And we know that does not sit well at all. Now this is my first VP meeting and let me tell you it was intense. Very Intense. Everyone is trying to throw each other under the bus and I sit and watch in awe how afraid every one is of our COO. The Sarge has his meeting and pisses off all of the other managers. Luckily I am not there. I return from the meeting and go outside for some air. And the battles begin........
The Sarge joins us for our fresh air. All finally go back inside except me and the Sarge. DING DING ROUND 1.
The Sarge says, "I don't know why you are in that meeting, I should be there. You have no business being in there. I f they want you to be the IT Director that's fine. I'm done. I'm the one who knows everything that goes on in the TWDC. I should be there. I don't sweep things under the rug. I call it as it is. This is ridiculus." (Yes, he rapes the English language. Even people that speak Ebonics say "Damn cracker! That's not a word!")
Tin Man calmly responds "Don't get made at me. Take it up with VPoO", you fucking midget.
Now the comment of "I don't sweep things under the rug" is one of the funniest lines I have ever heard. I mean all of the stuff that this man has done to others and yet he doesn't sweep. He uses a street sweeper.
Stay tuned for ROUND 2.
posted by TK at 9:31 PM
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